A Job for the Porn Pastor

The porn pastor better get down to Georgie quick, because the pastor of the Chapel Hill Harvester Church is you know what deep in sex scandals:

The 80-year-old leader of a suburban Atlanta megachurch is at the center of a sex scandal of biblical dimensions: He slept with his brother’s wife and fathered a child by her.

Nice, well that breaks one of the Ten Commandments, and he committed perjury which led to the discovery of this sin, so that’s another one, but that’s not even the tip of the iceberg here:

The archbishop, his brother and the church are being sued by former church employee Mona Brewer, who says Earl Paulk manipulated her into an affair from 1989 to 2003 by telling her it was her only path to salvation. In 1992, a church member claimed she was pressured into a sexual relationship with Don Paulk. Other women also claimed they had been coerced into sex with Earl Paulk and other members of the church’s administration.

Why this man has any role in the church whatsoever is beyond me. At least Catholics shift their offenders to a different parish.

XXXclaiming the Good News

When I saw this I was positively tickled: “Profile: Craig Gross, fighting pornography”

Gross, 31, is The Porn Pastor. He co-founded xxxchurch.com, a 5-year-old online ministry dedicated to helping people who struggle with pornography.

What tickles me is that there is a ministry dedicated solely to porn addiction. It’s basically AA for pornaholics. You even get an accountabilibuddy:

His site offers software that alerts an “accountability” friend if you view online porn.

Haha. Now you have to be accountabilibuddiable, or else you and your porn addicted friend might have problems. Of course, you could use this tool to let you know if he/she is looking at any good porn sites, which is actually a good idea.

They certainly have a dread of porn though, because his wife makes people shorten the word to ‘P’. Can it be that bad of a word? The P-word.

Looking around the website, I found a section on masturbation in which they say masturbation is bad, but give no real reference as to why, other than “when you jack it, god will kill kittens.” Very moving, and certainly addresses the issue in “non threatening way.” Yeah right, because talking about the topic is so threatening to begin with that you have to bring in killing kittens. The typical scriptual reference for the moral wrong of masturbation is the sin of Onan (Genesis 38:1-30):

The fixation of modern Christianity with masturbation is because they (perhaps) do not understand the laws involved and prefer to ignore, or trivialise, the issues. This appears to be done so that people are deceived regarding the real prohibitions. Masturbation is irregular in that the individual is open to sin at the higher levels that Christ laid on the elect in thought (e.g. Mat. 5:28). There is, however, no legislation concerning the matter.

This is what xxxchurch.com says:

We have had literally thousands of emails about this particular issue. We have heard all the scenarios. “Well if I think about fruit while I’m masturbating, then that is not sin.” Well isn’t that clever. Or…”If I’m giving glory to the Lord while I’m doing it, then that can’t be wrong.” Hmmm. Why don’t we just make that part of our Sunday morning services then? We have heard all the Pro-Masturbation Christian arguments and I wonder if these people are really dealing in reality. It’s all very intellectual and quite scholarly, but we still don’t get it. Sorry.

Masters of logic they are! And speaking of masturbtion and other prohibited acts in Bible, I notice the article says Mr. Gross is adorned with earrings. Isn’t that scripturally prohibited?

Now obviously there are various interpretations of these laws and rules, which should make Mr. Gross think before he casually dismisses other arguments as crazy.

A Swing and A Strike

The City of Ducanville, Texas is planning to crack down on swingers, because heaven forbid that people have group sex in private.

She [councilwoman Johnette Jameson (her parents must have wanted a boy)] said the ordinance is targeting public nuisances related to the Cherry Pit club rather than what people are doing as part of the club.

Sure thing Johnette, because parking in the big metropolis of Duncanville is such a problem, especially on the weekends. I think Johnette may be jealous that she’s not going to these parties (the Cherry Pit is in her district). And apparently Duncanville isn’t too proud of this ordinance since it isn’t being promoted on their website, and I cannot find it on their site. But, I did find mention of it in their agenda:

Consider approval of Ordinance No. 2039 amending the Code of Ordinances by adding Chapter 11B to provide for sex club regulations; providing for purpose and scope; providing for enforcement; providing for responsibility for compliance; providing for definitions; providing for the declaration for operation and maintenance of a sex club as a public nuisance and prohibited; providing for the abatement of public nuisance; and providing for the penalty of fine not to exceed the sum of two thousand dollars ($2,000) for each offense.

And according to the Dallas Morning News:

The ordinance defines a sex club as “any premises, person or organization that is presented, advertised, held out or styled as, or which provides notification to the public that it is a swinger’s club; an adult encounter group or center; a sexual encounter group or center; party house or home; wife, spouse or partner-swapping club; or that it provides permission, an opportunity or an invitation to engage in or to view sexual activity, stimulation or gratification, whether for consideration or not.”

And all this is necessary to address the parking problem. This ordinance doesn’t address a public nuisance; it regulates private behaviour in a private residence, and the city council, et al can’t even be honest about why they’re introducing these regulations on private behaviour. They cite parking as the issue, when the real motive is their distaste for the behaviour. Nothing bothers me more than pusillaminous, prevaricating moralists.

So, visit the Cherry Pit, contribute to their defense fund, and piss off the neighbours.